Creativity and The Lover

The Lover archetype manifests clearly in our way of working. Artists and creators, musicians, poets, sculptors, writers – all of these occupations clearly are channelling some aspect of Lover energy. You see, creativity is linked to sensuality and sensitivity, and the ability to portray the human condition in a way that invokes feelings in the people who see that art.

As many have noted, artists often have messy lives. Men and women of an artistic disposition often live in ways which frighten and threaten other people, but they are generally true to themselves and their own deepest impulses.

Equally, psychics appear to be coming from the Lover archetype. They too live in a world of sensation and deeply felt intuition. They too may be psychically unboundaried, and experience other people’s thoughts and feelings. They may, of course, also unconsciously allow their energy to flow out to others as well.

Impressions, feelings and intuitions about other people or about the past, present or future are all a part of the psychic’s Lover archetype. Indeed, intuition in general is an essential element of this part of our psyche.

But don’t think that Lover energy is all about being an artist or a psychic!

So many more simple life experiences, the ones where your emotions and feelings are activated, reside in the quarter of the Lover. Running your hand along the beautiful lines of a superbly engineered car, or admiring the power of an ancient steam engine can be powerful and sensual experiences for the Lover archetype. Even savouring great wine or coffee or chocolate are also activating for the Lover archetype.

In essence, when you’re working from your Lover archetype, you’re coming from your heart rather than your mind. 

The Lover allows us to be who we are – to actually fulfil our destiny as human “beings” rather than human “doings”.

The Lover in Love

The most obvious expression of the Lover in our lives is in our love life, our sex life. Indeed, for most people in Western society, this is the area where the Lover finds most action.

Falling in love is the epitome of the Lover archetype. This is a place where rational thought and balanced action give way to sensation and feeling. The joy of unity with another at the moment of orgasm is boundary-less.

To be able to delight in the beloved in every way – presence, touch, words, sight and sensation – is to actually feel more alive and to see the world more clearly.

Sadly, many of us are brought up in a way that seems to somehow inculcate disapprove of the expression of the Lover’s archetypal energy, and so we repress it.

Yet because the root of this energy is a desire for connection – connection with the world, or connection with ourselves, or connection with others – it will find its expression in one form or another.

And it’s important to understand that the Lover archetype  is actually the source of some of our greatest masculine power.

When we have a strong internal sovereign or King, we can connect with the Lover and ensure that our ego is maintained as a whole and inherently strong part of us.

Then, we feel connected, we feel alive, we are passionate and energised. We feel our ability to empathise, to be strong and to support others. All of us – men and women alike – need the Lover archetype to connect us fully to life and indeed to ourselves.

Lover energy energises us, humanises us, and indeed ultimately gives us a sense of purpose: to connect with others. You see, the one major purpose of this energy in adult life is to allow us to connect with other people: for connection is a vital part of the human condition – without true connection we wither and die emotionally, perhaps even physically. That is, I am sure, why 12 step programs can be so successful – they provide an energy that comes from the experience of connection.

If you have been on a well-held workshop you have probably come away feeling whole and happier at the end. The question you might ask yourself is whether this was due to the content to the workshop or due to the close connection between the participants which can develop so rapidly in this kind of environment.

If you accept that precept, then of course being in some kind of men’s group is naturally a healing experience. I run workshops from time to time, which you can read about here. (If you read the testimonials, you will see that men speak of the value of connection over and over.) So where else can you find a men’s group? To start with a few suggestions: first, my colleague Sam Adams runs men’s groups.  In addition there are several nationwide UK organisations which you may find helpful: Andys mens clubs, for one.  Men Speak offers another valuable outlet. And you can find a very useful summary here. You will also undoubtedly find local groups if you search for ” men’s groups in …” 

Of course other archetypes have their own mission and purpose, but connection and flow are the driving forces behind the Lover.

That energy, that impulse to connect in a loving way with others, that urge to express creativity, that sense of intuition, all make up the humanising force which maintains our compassion and sense of oneness with others.